Who doesn’t want to think themselves as being special in some way?
Ok maybe ‘special’ isn’t quite the right word for you here so perhaps to be noticed, admired, loved, needed and /or valued would be better suggestions.
We all know how at least one of these states feels like. We are all naturally drawn to wanting to experience and feel at least one of these. It fills us up and makes us feel good, hopeful and more effective. However don’t you just find there is a tendency not to allow ourselves the pleasure of enjoying the feeling more often?
I’m guilty of this one, I can get so wrapped up in my own little world, with all my so called woes; get so consumed by all the details of the so called injustices of life that I just don’t count those little acts of kindness others do for me. I can quite easily forget and pass up the opportunity to feel that which I need to feel the most. May be it’s because I’ve unconsciously set the bar too high, or I have an imagined, and cemented a belief of an ideal of how I think my life ought to be.
With the book idea, you’ll laugh with me now when I say the point I thought I would find that state that would make me feel worthwhile and valued – I raise my hand above my head – was up here. “oh at least 10.000 sales in the first year… not to mention the Booker Prize”. Too high. Not well grounded, or realistic and experience has shown me the same.
So perhaps for now, you could practice with me to deliberately try and turn the attention to what we do have in this moment rather than letting ourselves be distracted by thoughts of what we don’t have and want, or how we would change things from how they are if we could.
In this moment nothing is wrong… and relax and enjoy those pleasant sensations as they arise. Let yourself feel that which you most need to feel.